Sunday, August 21, 2011

:: Seven Years ::

Seven years ago I married someone who I thought was going to be my very best friend.

I married someone who made me laugh harder than anyone I knew.

I married someone who I loved to be around and who made me feel safe, comfortable, loved and appreciated.

I just knew that I loved this person and I couldn't imagine my life without them. Being twenty and (now!) I can look back and say I was rather superficial and fluffy for lack of a better word, I didn't understand definitively what I was getting myself into. I wanted to marry this guy (before someone ELSE came and grabbed him), and he was the most wonderful person I had ever met. Beyond that I didn't really think of much else. :-)

What I didn't realize and what I didn't know was how much of an amazing person I was marrying. I also didn't  know that the person who was my very best friend could also irritate me the most of anyone I know. The person who made me laugh hardest could make me cry the hardest. I didn't understand than that times of test make a relationship stronger. I thought our relationship was just spiffy. :-)

But something never changed. The person that made me feel the most safe, loved, comfortable and appreciated would grow better each year. The person who I felt was just my best friend helped guide me through some of the hardest, most terrible moments in my life. He was there to keep me moving, to pull me back, to remind me that he loved me. He was there for good moments too; to cheer me on, to offer advice, to offer support, to give me a swift kick in the pants. He has never told me not to do something- he has offered me the chance and opportunity to do anything. That is pretty incredible. You know the phrase, the world is your oyster? Pretty much what Chris has said to me from day one. :-)

The person who I hazily imagined on our wedding day as a dad would never case to amaze me at just how GOOD he was at that job. He is the perfect blend of love, discipline, humor and fun. I've been around some incredible dad's in my life, and I never once thought that any guy could ever really touch them. Chris has surpassed them all. Best dad I have EVER seen; real life, books, anywhere.

The guy who I married got a job the week before we got married. I never realized that he would give up some of his greatest passions to make sure that he could be the provider he felt he needed to be to make his family comfortable. Sacrificing things that you love and want for yourself is the mark of a truly wonderful, mature and unselfish person. Took me a while to really appreciate this about him, especially considering he is one of those wonderful people who doesn't rub it in your face or TELL you what he is doing. Now, I'M one of those amazingly lovable people who will say, "Just so you know ____- I gave up my nap today to pick you up from the airport..." Whereas Chris wouldn't say anything; even though he gave up his nap, his lunch and the chance to play golf. :-)

When you hear someone swear to love you for the rest of your life, through good times and bad; when you haven't gone through any of that yet (it only was good)- it doesn't really make a ton of sense. I was not the easiest person to be married too (not saying I am now necessarily...) but Chris was ever patient during the past seven years. The amount of maturing that I did between the years of 20-26ish (okay, maybe still 27) I think is a little shocking. The only possible way I would EVER advocate someone getting married as young as I did, have to marry someone older, and the person would have to be Chris. :-)  I credit Chris single-handedly with saving our marriage any number of times. There was never a briefest moment in our relationship where I didn't know in my heart of hearts that he was committed to this. That he would never let it go, that he would never give up, that he loved me and would do anything for me.

Seven years ago I married someone I was in love with. Seven years later I know I made the very best choice I ever made. I am so lucky that I got to meet the person I was meant to be with young. I'm so lucky that he loved me too. I am so lucky.

He is the best husband, friend, dad and person that I have ever met. He is the sort of person that most people dream of, or aspire to be. Thank God there is one of him and that I got him. I'm luckier than any girl in the world.

Best day of my life. :-)

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Mommy, I am not proud of myself...

Amanda related a story today that shocked the hell out of me, that
maybe we were instilling values in our kids after all.

Lia and David were being particularly troublesome while Amanda was
unpacking groceries: petty fights, whining, talking back, etc. She
the sends the locklings out of room to finish her work. When she is
finishing up, Lia comes back into the room with her head hung low.

"Mommy, I am not proud of myself."

Amanda was shocked, but managed, "Why, Honey?"
Lia looks up with mournful eyes heavy with tears, "Because I was so
mean to you."